Final Personal Takeaways
In every chapter, we provide a list of baby steps—the things to do tomorrow or this week that can be a foundation for everything else to come. Sometimes we don’t even take the first step because it seems too overwhelming and intimidating. Don’t give up before you even start—success in baby steps reinforces success in subsequent larger steps and builds confidence.
The baby steps for this chapter are as follows:
Take one situation that is not working well for you at work. Use Table 1.3 and think through the ERO Spiral for this situation.
Table 1.3 Examining the ERO Spiral
The excuses you are using for it
How it has or will build to self-defeating behavior
The obstacles you are creating for employees
The obstacles you have created for yourself
Reveal one self-handicapping excuse and one self-defeating behavior and analyze its triggers and what to do to reverse each. Here is the action plan (Table 1.4) for analyzing the triggers for your self-handicapping and finding solutions.
Table 1.4 Analyzing Self-Handicap Triggers
Excuse or self-defeating behaviors
What is the situation?
Impact on others
What to do/when
- Keep a log and track where you used blame to avoid accountability for an entire day. Ask yourself how much blame you heap out each day and its impact on you and your employees/peers.
- Which chapter on self-defeating behavior will I learn the most? Need the most? Why?
- What do you think your employees and peers are thinking and saying about you regarding self-handicapping?
- Can you see your excuses used in self-handicapping? Can you see your self-defeating behaviors creating obstacles for your employees? If not, what is your plan of action?
- Are you humble? Do you always strive for mastery of what you are doing—to know more and be better? How do these affect your self-handicapping?