What particular skills should I brush up on if I want to lead XP teams?
Read books that focus on the softer aspects of leadership, in particular those written from a values standpoint. Stephen Covey is a good general author to start with. Also, any books about EQEmotional Quotient would be worthwhile. Classic, project-management books tend to labor on the process side.
XP seems a bit too "touchy-feely," is this true?
There is a definite emphasis on the human side of development work, but it is at heart still an engineering approach. The close proximity in which people work combined with high communication, elevates the importance of the people factor.
Is XP leadership democratic, and are the leaders weak?
No, there is no democratic process to electing leaders in XP. There are times to direct your team members clearly and bluntly. There is a huge difference when doing this from a position of respect.