The language you use as a coach communicates your true feeling about the person. Remember to serve as a mirror, reflecting through listening rather than telling, using these guidelines:
Avoid directing the discussion.
Symptom: "No, that's the wrong goal."
Avoid analysis and interpretation.
Symptom: "Yes, I know which part bothers you the most!"
Describe the future in the present state.
Symptom: "What will your relationship be like?"
Push to the end result, not just next step.
Symptom: "Is promotion what you want in the end?"